Mikey's NFL picks

Last week: 9-7 Season record: 30-17-2 Just when you think you have this thing figured out, the football gods have the Bills drop a lopsided defeat on the Vikings in Minnesota.  Things usually start rounding into knowing how the season plays out in week 3.  But I think we're now more confused than ever.  Here we go..... Miami at New England --The Dolphins are 3-0 and Pats 1-2 which means if Miami wins, they will have a 3-plus game lead on New England.  But does anyone really expect that to happen?  Patriots 26, Dolphins 20 Philadelphia at Tennessee --What's an Eagles fan's favorite street food?  Right, cheese steak!  Did you really expect me to bring up the fan eating horse shit thing again?  Eagles 23, Titans 10 Cincinnati at Atlanta --Last year I had Julio Jones on my fantasy team, and he of course had a very un-Julio season save for that one game when he had 300 yards and 2 scores or something.  Dude does not seem to sniff the end ...

Last week: 9-7 Season record: 29-17-2 It's funny, last week I said I was on a roll and would probably crap the bed in Week 3.  I didn't do great, but I don't think anyone had the Bills destroying Minnesota on the road or the Titans being the Jags on the road.  The NFL is weird, man.  Here is tonight's pick, and the rest of the games will follow on Saturday or so.  Minnesota at LA Rams --When I first saw this game on the schedule last week, judging by the way things were going I was going to be confident picking the Vikings in an upset.  But I didn't know this game was in La La Land.  I just don't see them bouncing back from that ugly defeat to face what many believe to be the best team in football.  Rams 37, Vikings 23

Last week: 10-5-1 Season record: 21-10-2 I've been scaring myself with how I've picked these games--getting one exact final score and the exact point totals for three teams last week.  Then I was off by one point from being another exact score pick Thursday night.  All of which means I'm about to shit the bed.  Here we go..... New Orleans at Atlanta --I'm not sure I can figure these teams out.  So Drew Brees has not been Drew Brees yet.  And Julio has an aversion to the end zone.  Home team gets the edge.... Falcons 23, Saints 20 Green Bay at Washington --I'm still processing the Skins scoring 9 points against the Colts at home.  And now the one-legged slinger comes to town.  Packers 27, Redskins 20 Indianapolis at Philadelphia --What's on the menu for a Philly home game--cheese steak or horse shit?  Sorry, I'm never letting that one go.  You got your Super Bowl win, but the horse shit is a package deal.  Eagles 31, Colts 1...

Last week: 10-5-1 Season record: 20-10-2 So I had the same record for week 1 as for week 2.  But I have to tell you guys that the thing I am most proud of is picking the exact final score and result for the Niners/Lions game, 30-27 Niners.  And I correctly picked the exact point totals for the Bears (24), Raiders (19) and Patriots (20).  That may never happen again, but it's pretty cool nonetheless.  And now for tonight's match up: NY Jets at Cleveland --It's never easy picking games in the first month of the season, but one thing is for sure -- the Browns are vastly improved.  They tied the Steelers in Week 1 and almost (and should have) beat the Saints on the road in Week 2.  The Jets destroyed Detroit (try saying "destroyed Detroit" even two times fast) on MNF and then lost their home opener to a Dolphins team that took like 9 hours to win theirs due to lightning delays the week prior.  That elusive Cleveland win will come soon, like tonight soo...

Last week: 10-5-1 Season record: 10-6-1 So I'm off to a bad start this week, picking the Ravens over the Bengals Thursday.  I guess I forgot that the Bengals can be world beaters during the regular season, but are El Sucko in the playoffs.  I can't wait for them to finish 10-6, get a wild card spot, and then get destroyed by the Steelers or Jags in the first round--after which the Bengals will hold a press conference and announce that Marvin Lewis has signed a 10 year contract extension.  Now let's get to Week 2! Carolina at Atlanta --Steve Sarkisian opened his fridge the other day, and on a carton of milk there was a picture of an end zone.  At least they have a good field goal kicker in Matt Bryant.  Falcons 22, Panthers 17 LA Chargers at Buffalo --If it was December I'd go with the Bills, but it's gonna be 84 degrees in Buffalo tomorrow.  And the Bills appear to be truly awful.  Chargers 35, Bills 17 Minnesota at Green Bay --Aaron Freaking ...

Last week: 10-5-1 Season: 10-5-1 Man, it's gonna get annoying seeing that tie game on the record.  It's too early in the season for that! anyway here is tonight's pick, and we're still in that mode of not knowing the identities of every team quite yet.  So here is the one pick, and the rest will be posted on Saturday: Ravens at Bengals --So are the Ravens that good, or the Bills that bad?  Are the Colts that bad, or are the Bengals that good?  Cincinnati always seems to play Baltimore tough, and it's their home opener, so I'm going to do the sensible thing and pick the opposite of what should happen.  Ravens 27, Bengals 24

We're finally here.  Week 1 in the NFL regular season, seven months after the last minute of the Super Bowl kicked off.  It's a clean slate, all of our teams have Super Bowl aspirations--some more so than others--and a whole new season is about to unfold.  So with that, let's guess how the first week's slate of games will shake out..... Atlanta at Philadelphia --Yeah, I get it.  The Eagles completed an improbable run to the title even after Carson Wentz went down with a knee injury late last season.  They even beat the Patriots in the big game with Nick Foles under center.  And then as the city of Philly erupted in celebration, one very hungry fan decided to treat himself to a midnight snack of horse shit.  That's about right.  Eagles 27, Falcons 20 Buffalo at Baltimore --Wings vs. crab cakes.  Wings would win that for most football fans, but I think most football fans would go with the Ravens at home.  Ravens 23, Bills 16 Jacksonv...

Hot damn.  I remember when the Super Bowl ended (and the Eagles won....grrrrrr), all we could do was to look ahead--first to the draft, and then to training camp and preseason.....and it all seemed so far in the distance.  well now we are four days until the Thursday opener (Eagles...grrrrr), and one week until that glorious first Sunday when we have 13 games on the slate.  Last year I had every intention of lasting the full season of picking the games but for whatever reason stopped after Week 3.  So I have that intention again of taking this through the Super Bowl--my picks will be one part actual educated guessing and two or three parts snark.  So thanks for reading and happy football season to you all!