Week 4 picks
Last week: 9-7
Season record: 30-17-2
Just when you think you have this thing figured out, the football gods have the Bills drop a lopsided defeat on the Vikings in Minnesota. Things usually start rounding into knowing how the season plays out in week 3. But I think we're now more confused than ever. Here we go.....
Miami at New England--The Dolphins are 3-0 and Pats 1-2 which means if Miami wins, they will have a 3-plus game lead on New England. But does anyone really expect that to happen? Patriots 26, Dolphins 20
Philadelphia at Tennessee--What's an Eagles fan's favorite street food? Right, cheese steak! Did you really expect me to bring up the fan eating horse shit thing again? Eagles 23, Titans 10
Cincinnati at Atlanta--Last year I had Julio Jones on my fantasy team, and he of course had a very un-Julio season save for that one game when he had 300 yards and 2 scores or something. Dude does not seem to sniff the end zone anymore. So I did the logical thing--I drafted the guy I thought might bogart TDs from Julio in Calvin Ridley. For one week at least, I looked like a genius. Falcons 28, Bengals 27
Tampa Bay at Chicago--I am having NFC Central flashbacks, when these two teams were big-time rivals. I know, nobody cares. Bears 20, Bucs 17
Detroit at Dallas--It's the Thanksgiving Day in September bowl! Who will be today's turkey? Cowboys 28, Lions 24
Buffalo at Green Bay--There is nothing more satisfying than blowing out all of your morning boogers like I just did. The first sip of coffee is a close second on the satisfying meter. Packers 35, Bills 17
Houston at Indianapolis--If the Texans fall to 0-4, Bill O'Brien may want to hide in his own chin hole to keep the football grim reaper away. Texans 21, Colts 20
NY Jets at Jacksonville--Good thing I didn't tout the Jags as the Super Bowl favorite a week ago, that would have been stupid to say right before they lost at home to the Titans. Oh, I did tout? Okay, I'm busted. Jags 19, Jets 17
Seattle at Arizona--I guess we'll get to see the beginning of the Josh Rosen "I told you so for not drafting me before Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold or Josh Allen" world tour. And that beginning will commence with four picks. Seahawks 27, Cards 17
Cleveland at Oakland--Don't look now, but the Browns are actually decent, and the spark from bringing in Mayfield last week against the Jets may put them at an even higher level. Chuckie's Raiders, not so much. Browns 23, Raiders 20
San Francisco at LA Chargers--It's a rematch of Super Bowl 29, which nobody cares about but I bet the Niners wish Steve Young could come out of retirement so they don't have to trot CJ Beathard out there today. Chargers 34, Niners 10
New Orleans at NY Giants--I said I wouldn't pick the G-men until they showed me something. And they did just that. But the Saints are just a tad better than the Texans, and Big Blue likes to get our hopes up and then crush them. Saints 26, Giants 24
Baltimore at Pittsburgh--With the Browns relevant again and the Bengals in their usual regular season world-beater status, this matchup loses some of its appeal. Not that it had much appeal in the first place outside of two cities. Steelers 31, Ravens 27
Kansas City at Denver--You might think the Chiefs are due for a letdown. I'm thinking of Pat Mahomes throwing 80 yard bombs in the thin air of Mile High. Chiefs 27, Broncos 20
Season record: 30-17-2
Just when you think you have this thing figured out, the football gods have the Bills drop a lopsided defeat on the Vikings in Minnesota. Things usually start rounding into knowing how the season plays out in week 3. But I think we're now more confused than ever. Here we go.....
Miami at New England--The Dolphins are 3-0 and Pats 1-2 which means if Miami wins, they will have a 3-plus game lead on New England. But does anyone really expect that to happen? Patriots 26, Dolphins 20
Philadelphia at Tennessee--What's an Eagles fan's favorite street food? Right, cheese steak! Did you really expect me to bring up the fan eating horse shit thing again? Eagles 23, Titans 10
Cincinnati at Atlanta--Last year I had Julio Jones on my fantasy team, and he of course had a very un-Julio season save for that one game when he had 300 yards and 2 scores or something. Dude does not seem to sniff the end zone anymore. So I did the logical thing--I drafted the guy I thought might bogart TDs from Julio in Calvin Ridley. For one week at least, I looked like a genius. Falcons 28, Bengals 27
Tampa Bay at Chicago--I am having NFC Central flashbacks, when these two teams were big-time rivals. I know, nobody cares. Bears 20, Bucs 17
Detroit at Dallas--It's the Thanksgiving Day in September bowl! Who will be today's turkey? Cowboys 28, Lions 24
Buffalo at Green Bay--There is nothing more satisfying than blowing out all of your morning boogers like I just did. The first sip of coffee is a close second on the satisfying meter. Packers 35, Bills 17
Houston at Indianapolis--If the Texans fall to 0-4, Bill O'Brien may want to hide in his own chin hole to keep the football grim reaper away. Texans 21, Colts 20
NY Jets at Jacksonville--Good thing I didn't tout the Jags as the Super Bowl favorite a week ago, that would have been stupid to say right before they lost at home to the Titans. Oh, I did tout? Okay, I'm busted. Jags 19, Jets 17
Seattle at Arizona--I guess we'll get to see the beginning of the Josh Rosen "I told you so for not drafting me before Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold or Josh Allen" world tour. And that beginning will commence with four picks. Seahawks 27, Cards 17
Cleveland at Oakland--Don't look now, but the Browns are actually decent, and the spark from bringing in Mayfield last week against the Jets may put them at an even higher level. Chuckie's Raiders, not so much. Browns 23, Raiders 20
San Francisco at LA Chargers--It's a rematch of Super Bowl 29, which nobody cares about but I bet the Niners wish Steve Young could come out of retirement so they don't have to trot CJ Beathard out there today. Chargers 34, Niners 10
New Orleans at NY Giants--I said I wouldn't pick the G-men until they showed me something. And they did just that. But the Saints are just a tad better than the Texans, and Big Blue likes to get our hopes up and then crush them. Saints 26, Giants 24
Baltimore at Pittsburgh--With the Browns relevant again and the Bengals in their usual regular season world-beater status, this matchup loses some of its appeal. Not that it had much appeal in the first place outside of two cities. Steelers 31, Ravens 27
Kansas City at Denver--You might think the Chiefs are due for a letdown. I'm thinking of Pat Mahomes throwing 80 yard bombs in the thin air of Mile High. Chiefs 27, Broncos 20
Comments
Post a Comment