Week 17 2020 picks

Last week: 10-6
Season record: 149-91

It's fucking Week 17 already.  Believe it or not, the current football season has been longer in weeks than baseball's season, including playoffs, in 2020.  Not that you give a shit about that right now, but it's a worthless fun fact to not impress your friends with.  Now, let's get to what we came here for.  

Atlanta at Tampa Bay--Tampa has clinched a playoff spot and is more or less locked in to a 5 or 6 seed.  You have to believe they want the 5-seed in order to travel to Washington, New York or Dallas in order to play a possible 6-10 division winner.  Bucs 27, Falcons 23

Dallas at NY Giants--Oh how I wish my Giants could beat their annoying division rivals at home with everything on the line, but they just don't have the offensive firepower at all right now.  And their D is starting to tire out after averaging 36 minutes per game over the last three.  Yikes.  Cowboys 24, Giants 13

NY Jets at New England--It's incredibly weird that the Jets have won two in a row after losing 13 straight to start the season.  Leave it to them to fuck up their draft position just like that.  Patriots 26, Jets 20

Minnesota at Detroit--Wow, the Vikings have been a disappointment.  The Lions, well, you know.  Lions 30, Vikings 23

Pittsburgh at Cleveland--The Browns are still feeling the effects of Covid, but luckily will not be trotting out only practice squad receivers this week.  The Steelers are locked in to host a playoff game so word is Big Ben is sitting.  I actually like the Browns chances even though bad things tend to happen there.  Browns 23, Steelers 19

Baltimore at Cincinnati--There are five teams that are 10-5 in the AFC and one of them will be out.  Suffice to say the Ravens need to win this game and won't be resting any starters.  Ravens 27, Bengals 16

Miami at Buffalo--The Bills will host a wild card game so Miami needs this game more, but something tells me the Bills will try to knock out their division foes.  Bills 20, Dolphins 17

Seattle at San Francisco--Wow, there are 8 late games.  Red Zone is gonna be awesome, even if/when I'm angry about the Giants losing to Dallas.  Oh and Seattle wants that 1-seed, or the chance of a 1-seed really bad.  Seahawks 29, Niners 19

Arizona at LA Rams--These teams are literally playing for a playoff berth, so this is basically an early playoff game, one of several on Sunday.  PS what the fuck is wrong with the Rams?  Cards 23, Rams 22

Jacksonville at Indianapolis--Must win for Indy means Jacksonville goes 1-15.  Colts 27, Jags 10

Tennessee at Houston--The Titans need this game because if they lose and the Colts win, it's quite possible the Titans go home.  Titans 28, Texans 21

Las Vegas at Denver--Gruden's Raiders sure bummed out their new fans in Vegas by melting down the stretch.  Broncos 13, Raiders 9

LA Chargers at Kansas City--With the Chiefs locked in to the 1-seed, I don't know how many starters will rest, so my guess is Justin Herbert notches another win.  That kid is gonna be special.  Not Mahomes special, but special.  Chargers 31, Chiefs 24

Green Bay at Chicago--The Bears are on the bubble after really floundering at the start of the second half of the season.  But the Packers want that 1-seed locked, and should not trust the Niners to upset Seattle.  Packers 31, Bears 28

New Orleans at Carolina--Man, seeing Drew Brees and his cracked ribs get hit the other day hurt me from here.  I wonder if they rest him since they at least have the division locked.  Panthers 21, Saints 17

Washington at Philadelphia--If the WFC wins, they win the crappy NFC East.  If they lose, and you know Philly will be gunning to knock them out, the winner of the Dallas/NYG game wins the division.  I really hope I'm watching this game rooting for the Eagles, which is a sentence I hope to never write again.  PS seeing Alex Smith try to run or take a hit is even worse than seeing Brees get hit.  WFC 23, Eagles 20

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